Plus Zero

I think I'm done with Lumberjack, at least for now. Its just too much drama, well not exactly drama, more hot and cold. And its definitely been more cold then hot lately, and I'm just not the type of girl who chases boys down. Especially when I wasn't even that sure I really wanted him in the first place.

What lead to this revelation you ask?

Well here's the post NYE wrap up:

I had a wedding to attend on January 10. It was for a friend I used to work with in the middle of nowhere. I was not sure who I would know at this celebration so I was really hoping to bring a date. Lucky for me my friend was able to let me wait until a week before the date to confirm whether I was a plus one or a plus zero.

I went back and forth whether or not to invite Lumberjack. PhD was a big advocate for it. So as time ticked down on my date deadline I called him, my heart pounding a little not wanting to hear no.

I only get voicemail. Not about to ask a guy via voicemail I just say "hi." Then I get back to my friend saying I would be plus zero. Not his fault I know. I never asked him to come. (He did call back about an hour after I confirmed my single status).

We talked after and he said he would be coming by the following Friday if that would work for me. When I called to confirm the night before, he decided it wouldn't work for him. I was disappointed but not really surprised. So I started thinking that maybe it was time to let him go.

STOP the PRESSES

He just called again to see if I was available tonight (I'm not, going to watch the towns hockey team demolishe their rivals...at least I hope so).

So maybe the story is less finished then I thought.

But I'm still sticking to my guns. I'm putting myself out there for a guy I'm not 100% sure I'm into. I don't want to lead him on any more then I want to get my hopes up. A long distance relationship is hard enough as it is without constantly reassuring both him and myself that I am actually interested in him.

I will likely continue to see him on a very casual and infrequent basis. Maybe we will go somewhere maybe we won't. Either way, there will be no more tears.